If you are having a hard time with finding balance in your life as a mother, you may sometimes wonder, “Is this what my life has come to?” Every second of the day, you are stressed out, in a rush, or find yourself just going through the motions of being a working mother. It is common for a mother who suffers from a lack of balance to often experience fatigue, irritability, overwhelming stress, and even illness. Performing this balancing act truly does take a toll on one’s mind, body, and spirit, but it shouldn’t.
This is no way to live your life! Living an enjoyable, wholesome, and balanced life may seem unachievable when having to juggle kids, a husband, work, alone time, hobbies, friends, community involvement, etc. In order to help get you out of this mess, I will share with you information that I offer my clients, while also making sure that I use it in my own life:
1. Prioritize
It is essential that you first recognize what your priorities truly are in order to achieve a well-balanced life. It is human nature to consider your priorities as the ones you or other people think that they should be, rather than what is really important to you. So, I challenge you to list the priorities that you want for yourself and the priorities that you think you should have based on society’s expectations. If they don’t align (which will most likely be the case), reconsider what your final list of priorities will consist of.
2. Rid Yourself of Anything Unnecessary in Life
Next, rid yourself of anything that stands in the way of you and your priorities. Once you realize what truly matters to you in life, you may discover that you’re devoting too much of your precious time to unimportant activities. Get rid of anything that causes you extra stress, or doesn’t add benefit to your life.
P.S. You might assume that some activities are ‘unimportant’; however, many activities actually help to relieve stress (which is beneficial!).
3. Protect Your Private Time
Everybody – and I mean everybody – needs and deserves some private time. Set aside hours out of the week to benefit not only your relationships but also you yourself. Don’t be ashamed if you truly just need some alone time. It is nothing against your husband or your family, but everyone needs a break to ease their minds at some point. Also, during quality time with your family, try not to go on your phone or check your emails. Protect this time with your family and don’t let work get in the way.
4. Seek Help
You are not alone, and it is okay to ask for help. This is not a sign of weakness or it is not selfish to do so. It is almost impossible to maintain sanity if you do everything yourself. Ease the burdens off your shoulders by having your partner, family members, or friends assume some of your tasks. If possible, hire someone to clean your house. It will give you a sense of organization in life and take one more chore off your hands.
5. Utilize Efficient Time Hacks
Although we all wish there was more time in a day, unfortunately, we must work with what we are given. To make up for this, here are some everyday tips to use in order to save time:
• Cook versatile meals: By cooking simple meals, such as baked chicken or steak, you will be able to use the leftovers in future meals throughout the week.
• Cook meals that don’t require you to slave in the kitchen: Meals that simply require you to pop it in the oven for an hour or slow cooker meals won’t require you to stay in the kitchen all evening long.
• Get everything prepared the night before: Set out your work outfit, your children’s school outfits, their snacks and their lunches. This will save you the hectic morning before your day even begins.
• Sneak in errands rather than devoting a whole day to errands: If you are too early when picking up your kids or you have a lunch break, pick up those few items you needed from the grocery store.
• Cleaning does not always have to mean ‘deep-cleaning’: If you clean a little bit every day and never let your house turn into a disaster area, then you will not feel the need to do an all-out deep-cleaning of your entire house. After your kids play with their toys or eat lunch, just make sure the house is always tidy and sanitary. The heavy-duty cleaning can then be left for once in a blue moon.
Remember that it is your life and you have control over it; don’t let life control you. To make sure you are on the track of what you want your life to be, take a step back and review your current life situation at least once a month. If it is not going the way you would like it to go, recognize the problems and find the solutions. We can restore balance into our lives if, we allow ourselves to do so. Always be honest with yourself in what you can and cannot do, and do not be ashamed to say no sometimes. Finding balance in your life, especially as a mother, is a continuous process and you will learn something new every day.
I tend to work way too many hours if I am not careful. I have recently started setting some more concrete and consistent boundaries and re-ordering priorities. Even just taking a couple of hours a day as sacred time with the family is a huge help. Very informative article and a great reminder! Thanks!